I am feeling the urge to spend most of my life energy on being creative. Most of my life energy right now is spent on my job, which is no longer creative.
I know that I should be practical, but I would rather be doing those things that burn in my breast. I am not excited by anything I do at work anymore. Challenged, just a little. It’s good to use the ol’ brain muscle every once in a while.
But there is a better use of my head than what these attorneys are using it for. I have my own ideas of how to use my head.
There are a number of creative types here. We all share that look-down-at-the-floor-and-raise-your-eyebrows-while-you-sigh realization that the bills come every month regardless of the burning in your bosom.
One guy is an actor, really with parts in things and stuff. He works early mornings and weekends. He has a SHIFT and does not have to stay beyond it.
One other guy is a musician. He was working and working so hard he finally put his foot down. He said, “I cannot work these hours. Change it or I’m leaving.”
He left.
But they negotiated, and he came back, part-time and paid hourly. But the hours are more and more not-so-part-time.
I am thinking of something like that too. Yes, lucky me, I am paid hourly. At least I am paid for every minute this job takes me away from myself.
But the hours are getting too long for doing something I don’t care about. 50+ hours a week. And with the bus strike, I am having to DRIVE to work. There is not enough head space to let my creativity reach critical mass and release itself.
It seems like I am gonna have to start getting creative about finding a way to get creative.