So, on her three week a versery, Veronica got to go down to the doctors.<\/p>\n
She is growing, and inch and a half longer..and she’s heavier. Up from 8 lbs 10 to 9 lbs 1.5<\/p>\n
That’s good. I guess she’s thriving.<\/p>\n
But there was a huge page of questions for me. Am I drinking or taking drugs? Do I leave this child unattended on high surfaces? Do I get adequate explanation on how to use the medications that were prescribed to me?<\/p>\n
NO to all.<\/p>\n
And then:<\/p>\n
Are you feeling blue?<\/p>\n
Feeling? Blue?<\/p>\n
Is blue the color you see when you are trapped inside the cylinder of a tornado? Red, gray, black, maybe. No, not feeling blue.<\/p>\n
But yesterday, she was screaming for a bit, so I decided if she was going to scream I might as well let her scream to some fun music. I put on some sing-along 80s music and held her close while I danced and sang.<\/p>\n
RIght when it came to the part where I could sing along, I was busting out with the chorus and my voice disappeared. It was the fun part.<\/p>\n
I hadn’t had a feeling a fun since…well at least since Veronica had been born.<\/p>\n
So that thought\u00a0required a certain amount of tears, which certainly have been present since V has been born.<\/p>\n
Then it made me feel mad, because, dammit, I am going to find a way back to, a way back to happy…if it kills me.<\/p>\n
And i realized that this state of affairs could be part of why I’m having so much trouble feeling optimistic. So I guess I can remember that I should not forget to get happy at least a little bit every day, until it comes back naturally.<\/p>\n
I think it will.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So, on her three week a versery, Veronica got to go down to the doctors. She is growing, and inch and a half longer..and she’s heavier. Up from 8 lbs 10 to 9 lbs 1.5 That’s good. I guess she’s … Continue reading