{"id":4314,"date":"2017-05-17T05:43:09","date_gmt":"2017-05-17T12:43:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/?p=4314"},"modified":"2017-05-15T15:44:00","modified_gmt":"2017-05-15T22:44:00","slug":"bettah-work","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/2017\/05\/bettah-work\/","title":{"rendered":"bettah work"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/em><\/p>\n

I spend a lot of time on spiritual activities. They\u2019re spiritual to me, anyway. I am constantly listening to books, lectures, and TED talks about positivity and improving my life.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve taken classes on the phone, and gone to events. I\u2019ve stretched my comfort zone and learned a lot.<\/p>\n

This week I\u2019ve been listening to Brene Brown\u2019s The Power of Vulnerability. It\u2019s a recording of her lecture series on authenticity, connection and courage.<\/p>\n

I can\u2019t stop listening. And I gasp and cry. It\u2019s good.<\/p>\n

But I\u2019m in this other class online. I took this class to bolster my sagging sense of self-worth.<\/p>\n

I could tell it was sagging because I was very reticent to spend the money on it.<\/p>\n

Self-worth.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t think I was worth it.<\/p>\n

So. I pulled up my big girl pants and decided to invest in myself.<\/p>\n

This class was expensive. So, I was committed to doing the homework.<\/p>\n

At first.<\/p>\n

And at first the homework was easy. Setting my intentions for the day (what sort of day would I like to have? Would I like to be playful? Would I like to feel secure?), and at the end of the day having a gratitude journal.<\/p>\n

Not so bad. And being a committed type, I have done it regularly.<\/p>\n

But then it got busy, and I didn\u2019t do the next assignments.<\/p>\n

I was still listening to all the recordings. I could do that while driving or doing housework. They were encouraging.<\/p>\n

The affirmation tracks were great. I even played them for my daughter after she\u2019d watched some TV that was too scary.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are a human being with flaws. You don\u2019t have to be perfect to be ok.\u201d<\/p>\n

My daughter asked for them the next night. \u201cWill you play the lady for me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Yes. Yes, I would. The lady was very soothing when I felt overwhelmed at work.<\/p>\n

And I was starting to feel overwhelmed a lot.<\/p>\n

I decided I should plug back into my classes, since I HAD paid for it. Take the time, I am worth it.<\/p>\n

So, after spending all weekend with Brene Brown\u2019s fantastic lecture series (very spiritual, personal-developmenty stuff), I sat down to do some journaling on the next module.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not the same. It\u2019s not the same thing at all.<\/p>\n

TED talks in my ears is not the same as quality time as separating myself from all the THINGS I should do and taking the time to do a little spiritual work.<\/p>\n

In my case, when I stopped and did the exercise, I reminded myself that I am not the victim in my life story. I am the hero of my own story. Rightfully so. And although I may feel like I am assaulted on all sides, I am in fact in one part of my story. My story is evolving continuously, and all the heroes have moments of conflict.<\/p>\n

Oh yeah.<\/p>\n

So. Not only am I the hero of my life, I really do find benefit in giving myself what I need to feel good about myself.<\/p>\n

Which means, dilletanting about with feel-good recordings in my ears is not sufficient.<\/p>\n

Doing the work feels a lot better.<\/p>\n

Still, I recommend you all check out Brene.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I spend a lot of time on spiritual activities. They\u2019re spiritual to me, anyway. I am constantly listening to books, lectures, and TED talks about positivity and improving my life. I\u2019ve taken classes on the phone, and gone to events. … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4314","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random-thoughts"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4314","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4314"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4314\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4315,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4314\/revisions\/4315"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4314"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4314"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/writtenbymurphy.com\/wonderblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4314"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}