<\/p>\n
I do love to work. Right now, as I write this, I am unemployed. I miss work. I miss having a focus for my energy during the day.<\/p>\n
I miss having a reason to talk to people.<\/p>\n
Is that silly? I do have a lot of friends. But to be able to talk to co-workers and know basically that they are PAID to talk to me is comforting.<\/p>\n
I suppose that says a lot about my insecurity.<\/p>\n
But it’s nice to have people that are every day committed to getting the same stuff done that I am trying to do. Even if it wasn’t our idea in the beginning.<\/p>\n
So, as I am settling into my look-for-work routine, I find myself in a different frame of mind.<\/p>\n
CHANGE.<\/p>\n
WE FEAR CHANGE.<\/p>\n
And people give me very good-intentioned advice:<\/p>\n
“Have fun!”<\/p>\n
My idea of fun was to work really hard with a bunch of people who were contractually bound to work with me. I liked that.<\/p>\n
Now I have to redefine fun. HMMmmmm.<\/p>\n
I usually have fun after I do my work. I will go be with friends to be silly AFTER the work is taken care of.<\/p>\n
So how do I have fun when there is no work to append it to?<\/p>\n
I tried guys, I really did. And in fact, I spent a few days kicking myself HARD for not being able to relax. Along with not being able to keep a job…and that one time when I let down that one person…and on and on…<\/p>\n
Wow. I do not do well with this idea of fun.<\/p>\n
So. After spending some time with that unfortunate concept, I’m back to another one.<\/p>\n
“This above all: to thine own self be true.”- Shakespeare<\/p>\n
Yeah, I like work. I like projects.<\/p>\n
GOALS.<\/p>\n
As I was listening to a podcast for FUN, I heard a woman express it. She said that goals are a way of expressing our fullest self.<\/p>\n
YES! Finally I hear someone that gets it.<\/p>\n
For me, I need some projects, some goals that I WORK towards or I feel very yucky.<\/p>\n
I know me. I will have to be true to my self. Yes, I will do my best to be FUN-employed at this time.<\/p>\n
But I GOTS to have my projects, and my work or I am not being my fullest truest self.<\/p>\n
That’s how I’m wired.<\/p>\n
I like it. Lists, and projects and milestones.<\/p>\n
Even on my time off.<\/p>\n
I’m not saying you have to. But don’t tell me I can’t.<\/p>\n
I’m not going to listen anyway.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I do love to work. Right now, as I write this, I am unemployed. I miss work. I miss having a focus for my energy during the day. I miss having a reason to talk to people. Is that … Continue reading