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<\/a>\ndon’t remember? DON’T REMEMBER? This is a biggest thing that could ever happen to a human being, how could that slip your mind?<\/p>\n
…and yet, I find that I am letting it slip my mind. I can remember the blazing terror of those months. But I don’t have to feel that way right now, and I’d rather repress that memory. So I let it slip. And maybe eventually I won’t remember at all.<\/p>\n
I do remember though. I remember thinking I couldn’t swallow the idea of a whole day at a time, and that I could only think\u00a0in 3 hour chunks. That if I’d had a bad night of very little sleep, I would dread the next nightfall with liquified guts. I’d\u00a0 tell myself that it must<\/em> be possible to get through this because people had done it from time immemorial and I’d tell myself that same thing again because I did not believe it.<\/p>\n Now I wonder how people manage to have more than one child. I can tell myself, ‘oh NOW I know how to do it, now I know what to expect.’ But I don’t believe it.<\/p>\n Except I do know a little. A very little. Mostly what I know is that it get to normal eventually. More than that, I can’t rely on.<\/p>\n In these six months, my blog has (d)evolved into a mommy blog. I’m not writing about abstract ideas or cute little parables. It’s all about sleeping and eating and growing.<\/p>\n Interestingly, I think more people are reading it. I guess sleeping, eating, and growing is something everyone can relate to. She is six months old today. Six months later and we have a new normal. And that’s okay. It may be new, but it’s normal again. That’s what counts. I was very skeptical that this would happen. The first four … Continue reading
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