Well, I tell you…
I talk about work very seldom on this site. Mostly because this site is supposed to be my creative outlet, which is quite separate from work.
But work this week is super busy. And I am feeling sick. I am popping cough drops and have a scarf wrapped around my throat. Nothing this week, and probably next, can wait. I have to get this stuff done.
I hate being irreplaceable. I try very hard to have a backup for myself, but it doesn’t always work that way.
But that’s not what I came here to write. I am writing because I am losing my voice.
Get it? Can I flash the neon lights on that metaphor any brighter?
Yes, my voice is receding back into my throat. My throat aches with the burden. So, I can’t speak well, and i am writing on this blog.
I was looking at other, better and more popular blogs. I’ve had this blog for forEVAH. I like my blog, but It is not at all organized around a theme. It just acts as a scratch pad for the most part.
I kinda feel like I need to grow up and make something of myself. SIGH.
But you know what? I somehow doubt that even the best writer in the world ever grows out of the need for a scratch pad.
Just because this scratchpad did not produce the works of shakespeare doesn’t mean it is not a good thing to use.
can you tell I’m sick, feeling a bit of self-pity?
i bought O magazine, and Elizabeth Gilbert had a piece in it about how we ladies need to GIVE OURSELVES A BREAK ALREADY! She listed some amazing friends who had impressive achievements. And she said that each of them spent time agonizing over whether they should have gotten that French literature PhD (for example) or should be working on losing those 10 pounds.
So, this country, this state of mind–dissatisfaction and not-enough-itude–is a highly populated one.
I just pictured a bunch of people in the “Thinker” pose, feeling TOTALLY alone, but frustrated at the other people pushing against them. ‘I’d be able to concentrate on how deficient and lonely I am if only all these other people would leave me alone.’
well, that makes me smile anyway. Maybe I’ll drink some tea and that will help.