not always for the asking

I have been quite disciplined this evening.

I ate a healthy dinner. avoiding my usual dive for the snack food upon coming home.

I made a new recipe involving Eggplant, a frypan, and practically no fat.

I ran on the treadmill for 20 minutes.

I then sat down with my files and papers and started making my papers into files.

Now I have cleaned up those files and papers, proud because I’ve taken a good bite out of this procrastinated job.

THe next task on the list is to sit at my computer and write something clever, insightful and sure to bring me international renown.

I’m tired!

All I want to do is sit in my hot tub. I think there may already be people from other apartments in it, but that doesnt even deter me.

Creativity doesn’t seem to lie on the desk underneath my papers, waiting for me to pick it up.

Too bad.

I’m off to be steamed and gurgled.

I’ve been accepted!

Chris asked me a few weeks ago what I would do if I won the lottery. I immediately answered:

Go back to school.

Fortunately, I don’t have to win the lottery to attend the occasional class. I already tried the community college nearby. It was kind of disappointing.

I am a GRADUATE now. This high horse has a nice view.

So I thought I would pay real money for a class, and take an extension course. UCLA was calling.

UCLA seems so cool! The campus is beautiful, and they have so much going on all the time.

My class is very short, eight meetings of “Telling on Yourself: Self-Revelation through Memoir Writing”

That’s what I seem to be doing lately, in my reminiscent pieces about Alaska.

I fear, however, that this class will be full of blue-haired women wanting to tell their life story. We’ll see.

It doesn’t start until April, but only 20 people were allowed in. First come, first served. I got in.

Plus, it’s for credit. Maybe I’ll work my way all the way to a masters eventually.

Now all I need to do is figure out how to park without paying for it.

The Hours

I went to see the Hours. I’d read the book before seeing the movie. What that means is that I ought to have remembered kleenex.

But of course I didn’t.

I think that reading the book spoiled a certain amount of surprise at what was going to happen. But then, reading Mrs. Dalloway prior to reading The Hours had kind of spoiled some of the surprise.

It didn’t matter, though. The movie was very true to the spirit of the book. The same feeling I had while reading the book, the feeling of being set adrift to revel in the details of the moment, were in the movie.

I could not help noticing all the small facts of decoration for the women. Their jewelry, their hair. Their clothes, yes their clothes. And the textures of their homes.

I don’t know if it is something innately feminine or not, but many many women take great pleasure in the little pretty details of their dress and decorations. The Hours was so much about women.

Being about women, it is of course, about all of us. We all come from a woman, after all.

The title refers to the moment. The Hours, the hours that go by and the hours that stay. Life is nothing more than the hours that you inhabit. Not the days, because an entire day is far too full to live at once.

The story in this movie takes a single day in the life of three separate women and traces how it unwinds. The story shows the experiences they have and the choices they make. It celebrates the fullness of life, in a beautifully honest way, revealing how terrifying, glorious and precious life is.

Obviously, I loved it. I especially loved it because it was not sweet or happy. It was just true. I hope it wins some recognition.

The Vista

Sunday, I finally made myself do something I had been wanting to do for what seems to be months.

I went to see a movie at the Vista Theater.

I’d seen the theater in my many excursions and it is beautiful. A single theater on the corner of Sunset and Prospect, with a huge brick red facade with a huge white scrollwork all over the front. I mentioned it to someone and she said, “Oh the Vista! That’s a great theater!”

So I was even more eager to go.

There was another local theater the Los Feliz 3. But people didn’t say the same sort of nice things about it. And it didn’t have scroll work!

Little did I know, the scrollwork was just the beginning!

The interior was beautifully decorated in Egyptian art. Men with towels around their waists did two-dimensional activities around the back walls of the snack bar. Inside the theater, though, was amazingly spectacular.

The bright red curtains (when was the last timeI saw real curtains in a theater?) were topped with hissy snakes. The corners were ornately molded with more snakes and other creatures.

Around the sides were gold-painted disembodied heads, regal in blue headresses. Under each was its own light. Lit from beneath, the heads were especially eerie. When the lights went down for the movie, the lights did not go entirely out for the heads. They glowed in the darkness.

But the seating was quite luxurious. The rows were very far apart. While I was sitting, I could stretch my long leg forward, point my toe, and still not touch the seat in front of me.

It was nice to have that much space. It occurred to me that I could have brought a tavle in with me, if I had wanted to.

The Vista is my new favorite local theater. Anyone making a trip to LA and wanting to see a movie in Hollywood ™ ought to go.

I felt like it was worth the eight bucks. And for me, that is saying a lot.

Just like a movie!

My good friends came down to L.A. and stopped to see me. We were going to have dinner here.

I was excited to have them come, so I wanted to pick a nice place to eat. I am a restaurant reviewer, after all. I ought to know places.

Well, maybe.

I thought it would be fun to go to the Tam o’Shanter. The place looks like it could have been dropped straight out of Stratford-upon-Avon.

The Tam o’shanter is a fairy tale looking place. Walt Disney used to hang out there.

But when I called, they didn’t have room for us.

So I decided we should go to the Dresden. I hadn’t been there before, but I had wanted to go inside and try it out.

It was beautiful. “It looks like it’s from a movie!” they said.

Cream-colored booths arching in an art-deco swoop filled the room. There were wooden beams reaching from the floor to the very high cieling, and lights that spiralled up through the middle of them.

To our surprise, the Dresden served Italian food. It was pretty and we had a very good time.

I LOVE YOU ALL!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

For you, my readers, loved and cherished by me.
I don’t know all of you, but it is a tremendous delight to know that you exist and that my writing is not a forest tree falling in solitude.

I have chosen a poem for you, by Emily Dickinson. She is also beloved by me. She was insistently creative, prolific and terse. She pondered her experiences and captured them in words. Here is one of her poems for you:

Come Slowly
by Emily Dickinson

Come slowly, Eden
Lips unused to thee.
Bashful, sip thy jasmines,
As the fainting bee,
Reaching late his flower,
Round her chamber hums,
Counts his nectars -alights,
And is lost in balms!

Gotta go back!

My Travelocity Fare Watcher says that prices from LAX to Moscow have dropped to $441. That’s pretty darn good!

When I went to Russia the first time, in 1991, I had to pay $1200.

For some reason, I was talking to my bus friend Rufina about Russia today. I was telling her about how we carried eggs home from the market.

It is my impression that supply lines in Russia have always been bad. This was especially true when I was living there, 91-93. There were rations in effect for us. FLour, salt, sugar, tea, candy, you had to have ration stamps for all this.

After a few months, the rations stopped. But that didn’t mean that supplies were readily available. One of the commodities that was hard to find was eggs.

Eggs were precious.

They weren’t around very often. I took me a while to realize how long they weren’t around. We’d been there for a few months, and I think I asked about where to buy eggs.

“They will be coming later.”

So I waited. I didn’t really think about it, but one day I was walking down the Prospect, and there was a huge line.

THe natural thing to do when you see a line in Russia is to get in it. You have to be prepared to take opportunities when they arrive.

I asked the people in line what was being sold, and it was eggs.

The line was amazingly long. I was surprised, because I hadn’t seen this kind of line before.

I had already learned to carry a string bag in my pocket. You had to be prepared to buy enough of what you needed whenever it appeared.

But how do you carry eggs home?

They didn’t have then in dozen cartons like in America. We were only allowed to buy 20 eggs each, because it was only fair that everyone got a few.

Believe me, I had my doubts about carrying those 20 eggs back to the apartment. First, would the mesh of the string bag let the eggs slip out?

Apparently not. I watched all the people ahead of me walking out with a string sac of eggs, gently laid together.

I guess the point was to walk slowly and carefully.

Neither of which I am good at.

But these were eggs! Eggs were precious.

I purchased my eggs, and slowly and tenderly laid each one in the sac. I held the sac carefully away from my side, to avoid bumping into it.

Visions of the mess and tragedy that would ensue if I tripped and fell kept me very focussed.

One foot in front of the other, I walked the few blocks to our home.

I believe we ate our last few eggs that night, the ones from the last shipment.

I wonder if they sell eggs in cartons there now?

Probably.

Song of the Year

My vote for Song of the Year 2002 goes to Elvis’s “A Little Less Conversation”.

Before that song came out, I really didn’t have any feelings about Elvis at all. He seemed to have had some kind of place in history, so I meant to find out about him. But I was never that inspired.

I got the Elv1s album for Christmas, and then I got a chance to get up close and personal. The whole album is great, I enjoy it a lot. It gets me grooving. There are a lot of stupid songs, like Teddy Bear. But stupidity in pop music is ubiquitous, really.

Being a fan of both the swing scene and electronica music, i LOVE what JXL has done with this one song. There is so much that is interesting and exciting, I could dance to it forever.

Humans are social animals -pt 2

In November 2000, I had a chance to visit Manhattan. It was for work, and no one else wanted to go. I was thrilled at the chance to spend what amounted to a week in New York City, on the company tab. They put me up in a Madison Avenue hotel, right below Rockefeller Square. While I was there, all the Christmas decorations were put up. The streets were bustling and beautiful.

But I was alone.

I got off the airplane in JFK and made it to the taxi line alone. Me and the cab driver talked as we drove to the hotel, and I checked in alone. My beautiful hotel room was filled with only me.

I found dinner alone, and I walked to the office building where I would be working. The dark streets were lit and the tall mirrored building waited for me.

It’s easy to work fast when you work alone. After I did my day’s work, I went alone through the subways and stopped to hear the street musicians play. I could stay and listen as long as I wanted.

I went alone to the empire state building and looked out at all those millions of light across the sky.

I went to the U.N. just to see. I went to Central park, and bought a knish, and later a hot dog.

I loved Manhattan. The kinetic thought-energy was electrifying. It helped that I knew my time was limited, and I had so much I wanted to see.

But it was very strange to be so alone in this huge mass of people. I wanted to strike up conversations with strangers, just to hear the sounds of my own voice, and to know that I was still there.

People were streaming all around me; passing on sidewalks, sitting on the subway–people seemed to be piled up on one another like iguanas in a pet shop. I breathed the air that millions exhaled, and walked through the space their forms had blocked milliseconds before.

New York is a big city.