After nine years at the same job, I lost it. It was a tough time. I was very ignorant about how to look for work. I applied to jobs and got no responses. If only someone would interview me!

With persistence and practice I started getting requests for interviews. At last! That longed-for goal.

During that job hunt and the others that followed, I developed a policy: say yes. Any interview any time. Yes.

This encounter with a hiring manager cannot be simulated or practiced except by doing it. Sure, I can talk to a mirror or even have a friend playact with me.  It’s not the same. It cannot be replicated.

Last night I fulfilled a dream of playing music with others. I’ve been practicing alone, remembering when I would perform with others. My keyboard, with the guitars, drums and bass.

For more than a year I’ve been longing to join some others. I’s gotten an invitation to join some musicians. I was so excited! I packed my keyboard and stand and got there too early.

That’s how eager I was.

There was socializing, eating and drinking. I was having some great conversations but I was tapping my foot to get to the music making.

Someone started to tune her guitar and I started to set up my keyboard.

I discovered….i forgot the power cable

Devastion.

My friend pointed to the piano. Gulp

Not my instrument. The feel was different. The sound was a bit off.

I picked out some notes, then I chose a song and started.

And the dam fell. All the musicians around me joined in.

I wasn’t ready!

The song was going and I didn’t know my way through it. Was I reading that chord right?

It sounded wrong but the song was going, and everyone had joined it. I couldn’t’ back out now, the song was flowing like water down a cliff. I could hear my instrument and the guitar next to me.

I didn’t know it but two other guiltars—three!—had joined in.

It has happening, I was doing it. I was doing it badly with every  wrong note ringing in my ears and it was ok. As long as I didn’t panic and give up. Don’t stop before the end.

I didn’t stop. We didn’t stop.

Nothing like that moment. No machine, no simulation. That moment of humans interacting and creating was exactly what I wanted. It was overwhelming and terrifying. It’s what I want.

I want it again and I want to do it better next time.

I had to say yes and step off the cliff.

This moment, this present is the only one. I am even more committed to the policy of yes.