Losing the Game of Thrones

I’d been hearing for a while how great the Game of Thrones series by George R R Martin was.  But there was some hate too, saying he had taken too long to finish the story.

Fantasy books are all about the series, and usually the trilogy He had three books out, but it wasn’t finished. The story wasn’t done. So I held off from starting it, because why begin knowing i would be disappointed.

Then he published the fourth. To much excitement, and I was ready to dive it. I read all three, saw how much the story was at a cliff hanger, then started the fourth, ready to be amazed and delighted.

I began amazed and delighted. But the story took some wrong turns and I lost my faith.

I lost my faith in the author. I don’t think he can pull this one off. I know some authors can do it. They can take far-flung characters, tell parralell stories and at the end tie them all in together.  Charles Dickens is a master of this.

I remember reading more than one Dickens novel, thinking, who are these characters and why are in this story? But I trusted Dickens. He would pull the threads tight at the end.

I lost my trust in Martin. Especially after Theon. That was a cheap plot ploy. Oh no. I am done and I kick dust on those books. Like after a college boyfriend who had so much potential but just WOULDN”T live up to it after graduation, I am burned and bitter.

Not everyone knows what a loser Martin is though. Because he has

A TV SHOW!

ON HBO!

with naked chicks and everything!

So, there are those who only know this story through the television series. And they haven’t seen the true nature of my despised and faithless author.

A co-worker was raving about the finale. I told him I was over the series, because of the books. He was in the twitterpated phase, loving and excited and ready to forgive any sin of the story.

Incest? That’s how they were in that time and place. It’s a good story!

Yeah, I nodded knowingly, it’s a good story. But he has lost his way. You’ll see.

“What do you mean?”

“look, when the threads of the story get so far fetched, the reader starts to think about the author and what he’s trying to do. That takes you out of the story and once that happens you have halfway lost. Then, the author, or storyteller can take it one step to far and the whole thing falls apart.”

“I dont’ get what you mean…”

“Okay, think of it this way. If the author is the storyteller, you trust him. In a book, you never see the author, but if it were a story around the campfire, you SEE the storyteller.

Around the campfire, telling spooky stories. One guy starts to tell a story, and you are all ready to believe

There is an escaped inmate around here. He was last seen travelling in the area. And he is crazy…So crazy…and he is evil. He has a demon-possessed chicken with him!

So far, the story is familiar and has the details you need. Scary guy, in the dark, and it’s magnified with the demon-possessed chicken. It’s the regular campfire story structure, with an exciting twist.

The inmate and his chicken were already caught attacking some campers. In fact, one camper defended himself with an axe and managed to chop the chicken’s head off!! Now there is the headless body of the chicken, running around trying to find his inmate friend. AND since the chicken was demon-possessed, the head is floating around trying to find the inmate too.

okay, this plot has thickened. we are still in the well-known territory of campfire stories, and now it’s gotten pretty complicated. There are three entities roaming around. The chicken body, the chicken head AND the inmate.

Now the inmate decided to travel with a rat…

WHAT?! that’s it…too far. The story teller has his audience throwing marshmallows at him. THAT”s not how the story should go. Next!!

See? The audience doesn’t believe this storyteller knows what he’s doing. And pretty much he doesn’t. You can’t have that complicated of a story. That’s just not how it’s done.”

I would go on a long ride with Charles Dickens. He was not the most elegant writer, but the man knew how to spin  a yarn, and he did not betray his readers.

Go read Dickens, George R R Martin. But I still am not going to read your next book. Theon ruined it for me.