She’s a young thing and cannot leave her mother

About a week and a half ago, I was losing my mind at how intensely difficult it is to take care of a newborn. No minute of any hour was mine. I was frantic, and wondered if anything would ever be easy again.

I had fantasies, back when  I was bloatedly pregnant about what I would do as soon as I had delivery the child:

1. Take a hot bath

2. Take long walks with the dog


4. Drink a glass of wine

But then she arrived and everything was so far away. A BATH! Give me a break! I was surprised i had time to comb my hair.

As for enjoying a glass of wine…I said to my mom “I would love to sit down and have a cup of tea. But there is a mountain between me and a cup of tea that I simply cannot climb right now. I can’t do it.”

Mom came down and helped me out. And she held the child while I had that cup of tea. In fact, she came down two weekends in a row.

But now she’s gone, and has to stay gone for a while because she has her own life in Sacramento. But somehow, a combination of the child getting older and me getting more experience in how to handle this (mentally and physically), I can see that things might be doable.

I didn’t say easy. Just doable.

So, as a matter of fact, my little child is sorta sleeping in her carry seat–she is okay with not being held ALL the time now–and I have just made myself a cup of tea.

Doable. A smaller mountain.