It’s been a month…more than a month…which means that counting in days has lost a little significance. I still note the days (35 today) but my little child seems to have gained some heft with the successful passage of time.
When I was pregnant, I told Chris that after the child arrived we would have a new chronometer. That we couldn’t just coast in a sort of grown-up statis where time was vague…”What year was that again? Was that before or after we went on the hawaii trip?”…It will be “That was before Veronica could walk” or “She was two then”
So the passage of time is quite significant in reference to this little one. And with the passage of time I’m getting to know her. I know it’s strange to say in this context, but I do not form relationships lightly. It takes me a long time to trust a person and really feel like I have that connection.
So…I think I am starting to get to know this little one. True, I have no idea when/whether she will sleep on a given night. But when she does, I can close my eyes and picture the different faces she makes throughout the day. And I know the feel of her when she cuddles up to me…the feel of how she cuddles up to me.
It’s like we’ve got some history now.